Still at the temp job.......but she's still letting me work 9a-3p which is fabulous.

Even better?  I have a phone interview that's NOT in the automotive field.  That's right.  The elusive medical field.  At a well-known (at least around here), stable, manufacturer of medical devices about 45 minutes away.  Getting in there would be a huge positive.  I know I could probably get in to the one up in Kalamazoo...I know almost a dozen people who currently work there, but we'd have to move.  And I'm not really up for that right now.

Dental bills suck.

Ran 7.3m yesterday.  And got the worst migraine afterwards...stretched right into this morning.  Talk about sucking.  Holy painful.  I almost called in this morning, but we gotta pay for those cavities.  Now?  All 4 kids can brush their damn teeth after every single meal, snack, drink of milk for all I care.  I'll encourage it.  Toothpaste is cheap.

Still at the temp job.  Not sure when I start at my old plant, but that boss is definitely still planning on bringing me back at some point.  I just wish I knew when.  Things were going pretty well - until yesterday.  It started out okay.  I got approval to work 9a-3p...which is great since there's an hour drive on either side of that.  DH got put on overtime, an hour a day.  So he's working 7a-4:30p, which is why I wanted to leave earlier.

But then I got home yesterday, and the bill for #2's dental work was there.  And everything just went to crap.  This temp job covers the nanny, gas, and I MAYBE take home $150 a week working only 30 hours.  Mostly, though, it's just significantly less than we're used to.  But I was unemployed and needed a job.

Her dental bill just completely wiped out our savings.  5 cavities, plus sealants, plus GAS because she couldn't calm down.  $700.  After insurance on the first 2.  (It expired at the end of July and we couldn't get all 5 of them filled before them...so that's actually only 3 cavities plus our portion of the other 2.)

And we are wiped out.  For the first time in a long time, I can't pay the entire credit card bill.  Only half.  But I have the last full payment on my van as well.  Plus DH's car insurance bill showed up in my email last night.  And the first payment for the girls tuition.  Plus a massive water bill because it was so hot the water in the pool kept getting lower.  Plus a huge electric bill because it was so hot the AC was running constantly.  Plus all the beginning of the year school costs. (School supplies for 3?  $150 and that does NOT include backpacks and lunchboxes.)  It was just like all of a sudden everything hit.  All at once.  And it SUCKS.  We were so on track to be in a decent place financially.  Now I just feel like I got hit with a car.  :(  DH had to give me a good chunk of his Jeep fund as well. 

But now, I have to find out if I can work longer or not since I just got reduced hours approved to help make extra money.  I also spent a good portion of last night looking for better paying jobs, closer to home. 

In good news, the girls are doing well at school.  #3 is so excited to start preschool in September, and #4 is doing decently in Speech Therapy.  Still frustrating, but he's definitely improving.

All in all though?  Not impressed with August right now.  Hoping the rest of the month is better.

Hmmmm - it's been a lot longer than I thought.

July 19 was my last day at the sucky job.  It was the first time I've ever been fired.  Ever.  But it was a race to see if I quit or got fired first.  There was some mildly unethical crap going on.  I didn't fall in line, and actually argued against what was going on, so I figured it wouldn't be long.  Fortunately, we only owe $425 on the van.  Then all we have is the house left.  It will be a huge birthday present to me to get that title in the mail! 

We can afford to live with just DH working.  It's tight, and sucks at times.  Especially Christmas.  But we can do it.  The kids school tuition is what would suck the most.  It's not that much...$350 a month total for all 3 of them, but it's enough that it makes things tight when they wouldn't be otherwise.  My uncle offered to pay half of their tuition, and DH was going to ask MIL for the other half as our Christmas present...but we still have to come up with it to start with.  Even if she didn't give it to us though, we'd figure something out.  So we decided I'd stay home for a while.  I canceled the satellite dish (oh my little DVR, how I miss you!), and we stopped spending. 

Four days later I had two phone calls.  That was Friday, July 23.  On Monday July 26, I had to go pee in a cup and started another job on the 27th.  It's a temp thing, and mostly just a favor for a friend.  It pays okay, but not great...mostly I'm only doing it because she asked.  It's an hour drive, and easy work, supposed to last 2-3 weeks.  I already told her that next Friday is my last day...this drive is rough.

And that's great, because the other phone call was that my old plant was re-opening and my former boss wants me to go work for him again.  Right now there's only 4 people there, and he's basically just waiting for me to be done here so I can go back there.  Have to transfer all the equipment back in, and start the plant up.  It's a lot more money.  It's a 7 minute drive.  And the kids school is on the way.  I drop the girls off on my way into work.  They are flexible and work with me on hours if I need to go do something, like doctor appointments or school meetings, whatever.  So I should be back there probably the 16th.  Or maybe the 23rd. 

I can't wait.  I miss that place.  I really liked the people I worked with and after 3 years, I had really started to feel like I KNEW the job and was getting really comfortable with it.  Still not sure I love being an engineer, but I'm pretty sure that's what I'm going to be when I grow up.....

But yeah.  I was a little sad that I only had 4 days off!  I honestly thought I was going to get more, and was surprised to get two offers in one day really.  Had I known that, I would have quit that shithole I was working at for 5 months!

Running is going okay.  Not sure how my half is going to go...I'm 7 weeks out, and am getting shin splints again.  It's my own fault, I slowed way the hell down on running.  I was down to 3m once a week...then suddenly went up to 11-14m in 3 runs, without really doing anything else.  Too much, too soon, too fast.  Plus I tend to overstride, and heel striking causing them as well.  So I only did 2m yesterday (in 91% humidity TYVM) and iced the rest of the night.  Thursday run will be the same or nothing only on the dreadmill.  And Sunday, I may reduce my 6m long run a bit.  We'll see how my shins are feeling.  But I have 8 races between Labor Day and Thanksgiving, plus the Indy Mini on Mother's Day again, so I have to get healed!

Wow...this is how ridiculous busy I've been.  Haven't even had time to post.

Went to 2nd shift.  Had to leave home at 4:20pm.  (DH gets home at 4pm.)  Then worked and eventually got back home around 5am.  (On a good day.)  12+ hours sucks.  Granted an hour of that is the drive, but either way.  My feet are killing me.  I'm exhausted.  And I've lost 10lbs in a month.  Amazing what happens when I pick sleeping over eating.....

I basically sleep until about 1pm, get up and go to the grocery store on Mondays, run on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and hang out with the boys on Wednesdays.  Fridays, I sleep until 3:30pm because on Saturday I barely sleep at all.

It's supposed to get better...we go down to 8 hour shifts on Monday.  (Right now, I'm on a voluntary one week layoff.)  Which means I leave at 4:20pm, but should be home by about 3am.  I'm not holding my breath though...my boss is, well, complicated.  Some good guys at work, but a couple douchebags.  I am, of course, the only salaried female on 2nd shift.  So it's me and 7 guys.

Worst of all?  There is no place to go in this company.  I told them I wanted to be an Engineering manager.  They KNEW this.  But their Engineering department?  Essentially non-existent.  Their Engineering department is in charge of Maintenance.  They call them Maintenance Engineers.  I do NOT want to work in Maintenance.  Ever.  They work 7 days a week, 12 hours a day.  I won't do that.  Even with the paid OT.

Best of all though?  We went to the eye doctor last Friday.  For eye exams for 5 of us, glasses for 2 (plus new RayBans for DH because my frame allowance will cover that) was only $300.  That is astonishing.  We've never had eye insurance that did much for us.  The last time I went to the eye doctor (JUST ME), it cost me nearly $500 in glasses and exams.

That reminds me...#1 broke her glasses last week (for the 2nd time in 7 months) but they fixed the old ones for us.  But that was part of the reason we scheduled appointments.  And her eyes?  Holy crap.  She was -1.25 in both eyes last July.  She's already at -2.5 in both eyes.  She's trying to catch me apparently.  (I'm -7.5 in both eyes.)  #2 and #3 don't need glasses yet.

#1 is cutting off her hair for Locks of Love this weekend.  (If we can ever get the damn hairdresser over here...she keeps changing the appointments.  I pay extra so she comes to our house, because it's just not possible for me to take all four kids in somewhere and have it be a success!)

Hmmmmmm.  Can't remember what else I was going to write about.  May be back!

This dream sucks.

New job is difficult...not the work.  That's pud.

The hours are  miserable.  I worked first shift for the first 2 weeks.  I got up at 4am and left by 4:45am to make the 30+min drive in to arrive by 5:30am at the latest.  The line started at 6am and shut down at 4:30pm.  If I was lucky, I sat down 3 times a day.  No computer access.  Limited phone access.  At 4:30pm, I did my shift paperwork, and left around 5:15pm.  Arrived home a little before 6pm.  It was miserable.

Today I switch to second shift.  The hours are still long, but they are much more in line with my body.  I am a second shifter at heart, though this is more of a third shift position.  (I leave at 4:20pm, right after DH gets home, and will leave work around 4:30am.)  We are keeping the nanny, so I can sleep occasionally!, but it makes life much easier for both of us.  Now she doesn't have to drag the boys out when she takes the girls to school because I'll be home.  Sleeping hopefully, but home.  She doesn't have to drag the boys to basketball practice - which is HUGE.  That was one of the most difficult things I've had to do.  (Sit through an hour of #2's bball practice while keeping #3 and #4 off the court, away from the balls, away from the cement stairs, away from the balcony, and out of trouble.  My arms were numb the first week because I ended up having to hold #4 for over an hour.)

In other news....#3 is about 90% potty trained!  Last week he decided he was a big boy and wanted to wear underpants.  And now he does.  He is actually doing great with peeing.  His body is triggering his brain to go in and pee on the potty, and he does.  Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to be triggering him when he needs to poop so that is often ending up in his underpants and he doesn't even realize it yet.  So we are asking hourly if he wants to try pooping on the potty.  He's done it, but it seems to be more luck than anything else...

Good news - I got my first paycheck in over 8 months last Friday, and it was more than I expected.  We should also be getting back a couple thousand dollars from our taxes.  (We both paid in married/0 for Jan through Jun, knowing I would be getting laid off.  Even though I had no taxes taken out of my UE, and DH switched to married/4 then, we still overpaid.)

We are looking at vehicles.  My old van has a blown head gasket which is going to start getting worked on this weekend.  But my parents have a REALLY hard time dealing with our decision to get another vehicle...when we could just fix the old one.  However, part of the reason I had to go back to work was so we could afford a vehicle that isn't broken...partly for my sanity, and partly for the insurance.  The benefits at my new job are just so amazing that I couldn't say no.  The insurance alone would keep up from bankruptcy.  And DENTAL!!!!!!!  (And 401K match that I've already signed up for.)  But essentially...I have to work.  And if I have to work, I make enough money that I don't need to be driving a busted ass vehicle.  The old van was my favorite.  But it's a 99 with 186K miles on it.  We definitely got our money out of it, and I don't want to get rid of it.  It's going to be around $400 in parts to fix it.  (Dad and DH will do it)  But I also don't necessarily trust it to be super reliable for the commute I now have.  So we're looking at vehicles and they seem so confused....

I have so much to do.  So much.  I start my new job on 2/16...2 weeks from tomorrow.

During the two weeks, I have my physical.  (Tomorrow...I actually have to pass a physical, a background check, a drug test, and a credit check.)  I also have 5 more training runs.  Because I have my half marathon in 13 days, plus the flights there and back.

I also need to get things ready for my mom, clean the basement, find out what shift I'll be on (and for how long as it's a rotating position), the girls start basketball this week, and I have about 9 loads of laundry to do.

Mainly?  I have to figure out what work clothes still fit me.  I haven't worn dressy work clothes since #2 was a year old.  The job I had then was business casual, but I was 10-15lbs lighter.  The next job I had was a uniform, but then I was pregnant and they pretty much let me wear whatever fit!  Then my last job was jeans...it was a very dirty place and my boss preferred his engineers in jeans because he thought we wouldn't care so much about ruining them.  (Little did he know that I spend hella more on jeans than I do on khakis and I'd much rather destroy khakis.)

Anyway...so it's been about 5 years.  And at least 10lbs.  I don't know that anything is going to fit.  :(

And.........

no move.

I went on that job interview Monday.  It's a 35 minute drive or so.  And the salary range they had listed was 20% less than what I was making.  But I went, because really I do need a job.  And moving is not the preferable option, just because we ARE upside down on the house.  If I honestly believed we could easily sell the house and not have to come up with $15K to take the closing, I'd be all over moving. 

Well, I wasn't thrilled with the job - only because of the salary.  I really liked the people I met.  The plant was beautiful.  Excellent benefits (DENTAL!  I haven't had dental in 13 years!), a 401K match!  Holy crap.  Well, I actually even liked the job description.  It's not what I normally do, but they DO know my ultimate goal.  (Engineering manager...the position is essentially a Quality Supervisor/Customer Liasion)  They know I don't want to stay in that position forever and actually seemed pretty excited that I have a 'career plan'.  (It's not...I just know engineering managers can hit 6 figures and it's still not ultimate responsibility.)  I will be VERY good at the job.  But they came back and offered it to me yesterday...with a salary that isn't much less than what I was making previously.  It's the benefits though that I can't turn down.  Although they don't have to - they pay straight time OT over 45 hours.  (Right now they're working 50 every week.)  Medical that's SO much better than DH's.  (Seriously.  We have a $10K family deductible and pay $225 a month for that privelege - and then it only pays 80%.  This is $700 family deductible for $150 a month...and it covers 100% after the deductible!)  Plus the dental AND vision!!!!!  Tuition reimbursement.  And the 401K match.  It's not much...$.25, but I've never had one at all.

It kind of blows my mind how bad I've had it honestly.  I'm a freaking engineer.  I've worked for some fairly major companies.  And have not had jack to show for it. 

The best benefits I've had up til now?  Working at FedEx Kinkos...making copies.

Job interview went well, of course.  It's for a job I don't want.  I'd be awesome at that job.  But the 35min commute PLUS the 20% decrease in pay  is just something I don't think I can handle.  One of the other, I'd probably take it.  But both???

Sunday, I went to Flint to visit one of my best friends.  She just got a new job in Kalamazoo.  They are hiring 100ish people in our field.  And it's at a good company.  Like a 'keep this job for 30 years and retire' type of company.  So I would LOVE to get in there.  It's not automotive, which is another huge draw.  Since it gets me into medical, I might even have the option in a while to move back down here because there are 3 huge medical companies about 40 minutes from here.  (All competitors to the place I applied.)

I applied Monday morning, and had to fill out a couple questionnaires.  But the specific job I applied for could have been written for me.  About me.  It IS me.  This is the first job I've really applied for that I truly hope I get.  However - they had at least 5 or 6 that fit and I could do.  So fingers are crossed.

My mom was a little upset when I told her I applied out of state.  She knows we'd eventually move.  (DH would stay here with kids until the house sold and I'd get an apartment up there.  If I found a great school I might take #1 with me...but probably not until school's over.)

We haven't mentioned to the  IL's for fairly obvious reasons.  MIL is going to flip.  SIL will understand.  But MIL will likely remove DH from will.  And he will be so upset.  Not because of the financial implications of that...but because of what it represents.  He doesn't like to admit it, but he's absolutely a Momma's boy.  I knew that when I married him.  But her cutting him off like that would really cause an issue with them I think.

We won't mention it either until I have a job offer in hand and we have a plan.

Turns out my husband and I are on the same page...job-wise.  He just has zero capability to share that with me without two or three days to think about it.

Talked a long time last night.  Neither of us WANT to move.  Especially because we're going to take a bath on this house.  I need to have a realtor come over before I decide to take any job that requires moving.  The company that's 2 hours away has some relocation package....but I doubt it's going to cover the $10K or so we'd have to take to closing.  Which means we either walk away from this house, trashing our credit in the process and rent for the next 5-7 years, or we're stuck in this house.  I don't have a problem being in this house....but finding a job within an hour is proving fairly difficult.  Although I've had considerable luck in the last week it appears.

The biggest issue is, of course, his job.  But even he's at the point where he knows he's only there to keep his family happy.  It's a complete and total dead end job and he admits that now.  So if we move.  It HAS to be for a job where he could be a SAHD.  He enjoyed it a lot more than I do.  I really thought I'd like this more than I do.  But it's been 7 months.  And while I'm not chomping at the bit to return to work, I'd like to leave the house occasionally.  Right now, honestly, the only time I leave is when I go running.  Three times a week.  And at least once a week, I do that in the basement on the treadmill.  I'm starting to go nuts.  But we're pretty poor at the moment.  Nothing like trying to support 6 people on $33K.

Anyway.  Monday I have a job interview.  It's for a job I don't really want.  It barely pays more than unemployment.  Seriously.  $40K a year.  Which is decent for around here actually.  But is CRAP compared to what I made at my last job.  We were finally at the point where he was going to quit and SAH...when they announced they were splitting up and selling off the company.  We had to wait until we sold the old house, plus 6 months to make sure we were covered for anything, building up some savings etc.  I got laid off 6 months after we sold the old house...and it wasn't a surprise.  We both knew it was coming, which was why he hadn't already quit.

However - if I get that job, I'll have to take it or lose my UE.  And that means that I have 40 min commute, for $20K less a year.  So obviously, he will not be able to SAH.  Will still have to have my mom watch the kids...likely need to have her do more chauffering than she was before.  (At the old job I could drop the girls off at school on my way.)   This job is rotating.  Every 3 months, a different shift.  The 4th rotation is at the truck plant.  (On 1st shift I think)  But being back at the truck plant would be hard enough.  I worked there for 5 years.  Both he and I wish neither of us had ever quit.  He really thought he was headed to better opportunity at his family business though.  And I thought I was going SAH forever.  See how far that got me......

Anyway.  He says whatever we determine to be best for all 6 of us, whether it's moving or staying here, he'll support me.  And he'll quit to SAH.  But he also pointed out...if we're going to move, why limit ourselves to 2 hours?  Why not look anywhere in the country?  (I kinda want to stick to 3 hours away or so honestly, just so we're a car ride away from family.)  It just took him 2 days to say all this....of course, he had a miserable 2 days, because I was pissed.

Hmmmmm.  Tough night.

Guilt over #4's burn.  No idea how or even when he did it.  Had to be while I was cooking dinner.  I'm guessing it was while I was trying to pee with the door shut....It's about 3" long up his left wrist, and he never made a sound.  We didn't even notice it until at least 20 minutes after it happened.  It had already scabbed over and I never knew it was there.  When I first saw it, I thought he had written on himself with a marker.

And having to come to grips with the fact that J's JOB will always trump my career.  I have several big job opportunities at good companies.  That pay more than I made at my last job.  And twice what he makes.  Yet he just plain refuses to consider them because he doesn't want to move and because he feels guilty leaving the family business.  The family business that hasn't done squat for us.  That I wouldn't encourage my children to work at ever.  When my UE runs out, we're going to be so close on paying all our bills that I will likely get to go apply for food stamps.  We were eligible with only 2 kids....so we're way over with 4.  And WIC.  Both boys are eligible to get that.  And going through 7 gallons of milk, 2 dozen eggs, 3 loaves of bread, and $35 worth of fruit EVERY WEEK....well, WIC would definitely help.  (I'm pretty sure it won't cover the fruit, but even if it helps with the rest, it would be huge.) 

It's just hard knowing that it doesn't matter what education I have.  It doesn't matter what ambition I have.  All that matters is that I fell in love with and married a man who refuses to move and has zero ambition. 

Can't wait to attempt explaining this one to my girls.....:(  Hard to tell them they can do anything, be anything, and that they have choices, when I so obviously do not.  It would be one thing if I was CHOOSING to stay at home.  But they both know I'm looking for a job.  They both know how me working affects their life.  (Not much honestly other than materially....because my mom FT nannies for us, their life is really not affected much.  The only thing that changes for them is who picks them up from school and supervises homework time.)

So now what do I do?  Give up the job search that was finally yielding results?  Or attempt to find one within the hour commute?  (That wasn't going well...that's what I was doing for the previous 6.5 months.)  I have 17 weeks of UE left.  Unfortunately we have 7 months of van payments left and 3 months of student loan payments.  Then we're down to just the house.  It just really upsets me.  3 months ago, I specifically asked him "We need to talk about what would happen if I SAH.  Or if I should."  His response?  "It would dramatically change our life, and I'm not sure that you should."  So.....he doesn't want me to SAH because it would seriously alter the lifestyle to which he is accustomed.  But he refuses to consider some of the best jobs I could get.  [Yes, he would likely be a SAHD for most of these positions...especially if we had to move.]

And there we are.

Hmmmm - gonna try this again.  My last post here was over 6 years ago!!!!

I've had 2 more kids, 2 jobs, 2 vans, and a new house since then.

Unemployed still.

Had a phone interview today, but I'm not sure it's a job I'd want.  It pays significantly less than my last job, but has a 35 minute commute.  Which is a big deal with this many kids, after school activities, and just overall responsibilities.

School canceled today.  Icy out...figures that school would be canceled the day I have a phone interview.  Fortunately my mom came over and entertained them in the basement.  The husband had to go to Redi-Med and stopped over afterwards.  He strained a muscle in his left wrist and has a 5lb weight limit.  Has physical therapy next week.  It makes me laugh because I strained a calf muscle and can't do jack about it.  I'm supposed to stay off it as much as possible.  (Yeah, that's not possible very often.)  I'm supposed to keep it elevated as much as possible.  (Again, not very often because as soon as I get it up, somebody needs something.)   And I'm supposed to ice it regularly.  (Mostly I just don't like ice!  I've been using Icy Hot patches and they are working about as well as I expect.)

Ran 5m yesterday.  But I've now gained 10lbs since I got laid off.  :(  Sucks because now I have over 20lbs to lose.  Really sucks because I've run almost 40 miles so far this month and keep gaining weight.  Apparently running makes me hungry!